Howdy Hellions! While I’m out and about on vacation this week and getting ready to jump into a brand new career next week, I just wanted to pop in and let you all know that MAIL ORDER MASSACRES is now on sale for just 99 cents-a-roonio! “Whaaaaaaat?” you say. That’s right! For the same price as a McChicken on the McDonald’s dollar menu, you get three insane novellas all rolled into one! I’m not sure how long this sale will last, so grab it while you can.
Sea monkeys. 3-D specs. Hypno-coins. Ant farms. Kryptonite rocks. Miniature submarines made from cardboard. All available for a buck or less from the back page of comic books. And we blew our weekly allowance on these rip-offs, only to be disappointed when they turned out to be total crap. But what if these bogus products had side effects not advertised? In horror master Hunter Shea’s MAIL ORDER MASSACRE, sometimes you do get more than you paid for . . . JUST ADD WATER It’s been years since David and Patrick flushed away the dead Sea Serpents they got in the mail. After thriving in the toxic stew of pollution, strange, slimy creatures now rise from the sewers. Once the screaming starts, David and Patrick realize that their childhood pets really did come to life. With a vengeance. They’re massive monsters. . . and ravenous for human flesh! OPTICAL DELUSION Martin punishes his son for wasting his allowance on a pair of cardboard X-ray specs. But when Martin tries them on, he’s stunned to see through walls and clothes. But the novelty becomes a waking nightmare when the glasses burn into his face and he starts seeing horrifying apocalyptic visions no mortal man was ever meant to see. Images that turn him from a husband and father to a bloodthirsty homicidal maniac . . . MONEY BACK GUARANTEE With her son’s heart set on piloting his own nuclear submarine, Rosemary orders the craft advertised on the back of a comic book. But when her son nearly drowns in the swimming pool, an enraged Rosemary complains to the Better Business Bureau. The company’s customer service center retaliates with threatening phone calls. Then her son and husband disappear. Now it’s all-out war. Plus, Rosemary wants her $1.99 back! Praise for Hunter Shea “A lot of splattery fun.”-Publishers Weekly
I know, Hellions, that’s one strange ass title for a blog post, but that’s exactly what it’s all about.
Thanks goes out to an old friend, Brenda B., for sharing this photo and story with me. Somehow, during my research into the Jersey Devil, I missed this! Back in the 60’s in New Jersey, a cow and a deer carcass somehow made it to the top of a telephone pole. Locals attributed it to their friendly neighborhood monster.
Cryptozoologists say the Jersey Devil has kept a very low profile since the early 1900s, but if you go out and talk to the people who live there, you’ll get a completely different opinion. And here’s another shocker – I can’t believe how many folks have first hand Bigfoot encounters in the Pine Barrens. I’ve spoken to quite a few, some of them still visibly upset, even if it happened years ago.
I wonder if this was the Jersey Devil’s idea of a pinata? Maybe she just wanted to throw a party for her horrid offspring.
And speaking of horrid offspring, Pinnacle has discounted all of my books for the month of February. You can snag an ebook of The Montauk Monster for $1.99, The Jersey Devil for 99 cents or Tortures of the Damned for 99 cents. Time to load up those e-readers on the cheap!
What’s the strangest thing ever found on a telephone pole? For me, we threw a Batman figure that had a parachute attached to our phone line. It stayed there for about 10 years, poor Batsy’s color fading with each year.
I teased this a bit a couple of months ago and it’s finally here. The very first volume of HUNTER SHEA’S FAST FRIGHTS – DARK MASTER, is now available everyone ebooks are sold for only .99!
So, what are Fast Frights? They’re quick terror hits to get your horror fix. Right now, the plan is to publish a new short story bi-monthly. Eventually, Fast Frights will evolve into a monthly offering featuring some of the best voices in horror. Special thanks to artist Michael Chella for the chilling cover to get this party started.
10% of all sales goes to the LUPUS FOUNDATION OF AMERICA.
To kick things off, we have DARK MASTER, an alien abduction story that will have you looking askance at the night sky.
“I used to call them pirates.They come here in big ships and take whatever they want. Except they’re not here for treasure. They want our souls.”
Is Sheila Yates crazy, or are her tales of repeated abductions by extraterrestrials the truth Jason has been looking for? In a lone house in a remote upstate New York town, he’s about to find out, or go stark raving mad in the process.
It’s summer. You want to be at the beach or BBQ, chilling or relaxing with friends. I get it. Which is why I think short stories are the best thing to read when the temps are high and the waters are calling. Need time to dry off before you head to the bar? The short stories in my collection, ASYLUM SCRAWLS, will be your short-term companion.
For the rest of the summer, you can get Asylum Scrawls for only 99 cents. And it has a whole new look thanks to a new cover by artist Mike Chella. The straight jacket has been replaced by a naughty chair and it looks like something’s gone terribly awry! On a side, note, Mike and I are working on a host of specials for you, coming this fall!
Demonic possession, serial killers, monsters, beasts, the insane and the damned – they’re all here, safely tucked behind the bars of the asylum. These seven tales of the macabre and bizarre are sure to haunt you until the icy fingers of the grave claim you for eternity.
Download your copy today and have fun on the beach!