Screw yard sales where strangers fondle my stuff and try to rip me off for my collector’s edition Six Million Dollar Man Bigfoot action figure. Or take a whiff of my old bowling shoes, turning away in disgust. I have a wife to give me those looks, thank you very much.
Nope, I prefer to do this the new-fashioned way. It’s over 90 degrees here in the Big Rotten Apple, which gets me to thinking of books to bring to the beach. If you want to build your own beach read pile, I’m here to help. It’s time for a book sale!
I have limited quantities of the titles above, along with a couple of others. If you’d like one, or two or more, send an email to firstname.lastname@example.org with the titles you’d like and your address. Payments will be made via Paypal. All books will be personally made out to you so you can prove to everyone that you’re a true Hellion. You’ll also get bookmarks and I’m going to see if I have any official Hellion stickers in the mess I call an office. Be the coolest Mofo on the beach. Impress the ladies. Capture the man of your dreams. Read horror and grow rich!
The prices below include shipping.
WE ARE ALAWAYS WATCHING – $15
SWAMP MONSTER MASSACRE – $12
SAVAGE JUNGLE – $12
THE DOVER DEMON (NOW OUT OF PRINT) – $15
LOCH NESS REVENGE – $12
THE JERSEY DEVIL – $10
THE MONTAUK MONSTER -$10
TORTURES OF THE DAMNED – $10
THEY RISE – $12
Oh baby, do I love this cover! Severed Press nailed it. This is exactly the kind of cover I had hoped for when this nasty skunk ape novella first came out with Samhain. Word on the grapevine is the book will be available, in ebook and for the first time PRINT, in the coming weeks. Stay tuned!
As for my other Samhain titles, I’m in talks with an esteemed publisher about getting them all back out in the world. Can’t wait to be able to tell you about it.
So, what do you all think?
This is the second go around with this post for me. You see, I spent 2 hours this weekend putting together a comprehensive list of my 13 favorite horror flix for 2014. The kicker is that WordPress lost the post entirely. To my credit, I didn’t cry or curse or break anything.
So, here I am again, once bitten, twice shy. My reviews are short and sweet this time around, but you’ll all get the point.
I was very worried that I wouldn’t be able to find 13 horror movies worth noting this year. As of July, Oculus was my top pick. Egads! Thankfully, things picked up in the second half and I had a good group to choose from.
So, before WordPress deletes this post and me in the process, on with the show!
#13 – ALL CHEERLEADERS DIE
Funny, dark, twisted and downright strange at times. Come for the pretty cheerleaders, stay for the ultra strange story. Undead cheerleaders and magic go together like PB&J.
Sexy, gory and deliciously decadent. Paz de la Huerta oozes sex as a nurse by day who kills wayward men by night. A lesbian attachment to a new nurse is the catalyst for a nuclear explosion of a third act with enough blood to feed a colony of vampires.
Another solid horror flick from the James Wan gang. It has some genuinely creepy jump scares and a demon that’ll turn your bowels to water. The Annabelle doll is nothing like the actual possessed doll now under glass in the Lorraine Warren museum. Worth the watch while you wait for The Conjuring 2.
How do you top a movie about Nazi zombies? Pit them against Russian zombies! The comedy in this is as sharp as Dead Alive and the gore is goregeous. I think it’s even better than the first.
I LOVE alien movies. I picked this over Extraterrestrial by the Vicious Brothers because I felt this one was actually more frightening. The scene in the tunnel is worth the price of admission.
If you’re claustrophobic, this movie may land you in the nuthouse. Think Indiana Jones running around the Paris catacombs, that are terrifying in their own right. This is a very, very strange movie with tons of scary imagery. I compared it to the big daddy of funhouse rides.
I scoured the planet to find this Bobcat Goldthwait Bigfoot flick. A squatchman like myself couldn’t resist. The movie starts funny and gets downright eerie. The protracted scene of the couple in their tent makes for the tensest moment in horror cinema of the year.
This came out of nowhere and shocked the hell out of me. A ‘found footage’ possession movie that works! The actors look like real people and the mystery and scares are genuine. A great find on Netflix.
The Aussies know how to do horror. Mr. Babadook is a Dr. Caligari-esque children’s book that goes on to possess a 7 year old boy’s mother. Or is she? Turns out, she blames the boy for the death of his daddy on the day he was born. Great performances and a nuanced story with some super creepy moments.
I’m a Ti West fan, and I think this is his strongest movie yet. Set in a Jonestown-type compound, what makes this chilling is knowing that something like this can and has happened. The performance by Gene Jones as Father, the head of the cult, is the best of the year.
Another alien movie, this one centers on a young couple on their honeymoon at a family cabin during off season. Starring Rose Leslie (Ygritte on Game of Thrones), this one is sexy, scary and at turns, gut churning. A must watch.
Demented. That’s all I can say about this one. Oh, and funny, desperate, tragic, sick. Two down on their luck old friends get pulled into the orbit of a couple who make them do dumb shit for money. How far would you go to make easy cash, especially when you’re in desperate need of some greenbacks? Love this movie.
I know this won’t top anyone else’s list except maybe Bobo from Finding Bigfoot. What I loved is that this is a squatch movie where you actually see Bigfoot – and he’s pissed! Bigfoot has never been more terrifying. Fans of my book Swamp Monster Massacre will know exactly why this is my top flick of the year. Give me angry squatches and I’m yours.
Once again, Thanksgiving ruled. Great company, tons of food and my Seahawks won. Now, today is a day of rest for the Shea clan. I plan to do a lot of reading and work a tad on my novella.
For all you readers out there, today is a very special day for you. Samhain Publishing is having a huge Black Friday weekend sale, starting right now. Every single book in the store, print and ebook, is 30% off until Monday night.
So, if you’ve been on the fence about diving into the deep end of the horror pool, now’s your chance to take that leap.
You can catch up on any of my books you’ve missed for less than a cup of coffee. Here are the sweet deals waiting for you. Happy reading!
Hell Hole – ebook now $3.85, print $11.20
The Waiting – ebook now $2.45
Sinister Entity – ebook now $3.85, print $10.50
Swamp Monster Massacre – ebook now $2.45
Evil Eternal – ebook now $3.85, print $9.80
Forest of Shadows – ebook now $3.85, print $10.50
I’m writing this from deep in the abandoned copper mines in Hecla, Wyoming. It’s kinda dark in here but the internet access is surprisingly good. I just spotted a pair of rough hombres skulking around. They have the spirits all riled up. Hope they know what they’re doing.
As you may or may not know, my most recent novel, HELL HOLE, takes place right here in these mysterious hills. A pair of former Rough Riders plumb the very depths of these mines on the orders of none other than Teddy Roosevelt. What they encounter, well, let’s just say none of it’s good. Unless being harrassed by ghosts, black eyes kids, squatches and a whole host of craziness is your idea of a fun time.
HELL HOLE was written with the Halloween season in mind. I want people to read horror as much as they watch it, especially this month of #Horrortober! So, here’s what I aim to do. I’m going to give a free ebook to everyone who does one of the following:
- Go to Amazon, Barnes & Noble or Samhain’s website and post a review/rating for Hell Hole. Once you do, send an email to email@example.com with a link to your review or rating.
- Purchase a copy of Hell Hole. Again, send a screen print or other proof of purchase to firstname.lastname@example.org
One book per customer. This incredible offer lasts until October 31, 2014.
This is all part of my plan to win the lottery and buy the most tricked out RV in history, convert it into a book mobile and travel the country handing out books and spreading the love of reading. So come on, show your love for HELL HOLE and Halloween. I’ll make it worth your while.